And He Continues ...

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."

-Colossians 3:12-14

It's been a while since I've last posted, but I felt compelled to post this now, especially after the week I've had. Just as a quick check-in, life as a whole is proving imperfect on a daily basis, as planned.

The Factor House needs much prayer, for connection, growth, grace, and discipline. I think the tone of this week matches the need for our own house to forgive each other's grievances, to not hold resentment in our hearts, and to exercise grace and understanding, even amidst our circumstances. I'm finding less time each day to take hold of for my own self, even to dedicate to my lovely girlfriend Faye, or to just simply seek fellowship with brothers. Ministry has felt overloading, draining, and tiresome all at the same time, and the burden I bear for my brothers and sisters in ministry, though worth the effort, can seem heavy just the same.

What has been unplanned, and never ceases to amaze me, is that Jesus Christ never fails to come and rescue me even right in the middle of my circumstances. He's given a peace in the unmerciful, a grace in the ungracious, and a love in the unloving. He's given me rest, even in the restlessness of ministry tasks and duties, stresses from house dynamic, and drain of the practicalities of life. He's blesses my relationship with Faye, even with the little time we have to focus on each other, and as material as it may sound, He's provided for our daily needs, both financially, and emotionally. He's cared. Cared for me and sheltered me, caught my tears and held me close. He loves me though I don't deserve it, and for that I remain unworthy, yet forever grateful.

Life has been so good. And it's not to say that life hasn't been all I've hoped for and more, because it hasn't. God has blessed me beyond my expectation with what HE has felt I need, and which I've accepted with full trust, knowing He always knows what's best for me. Life hasn't been what I've expected because that's how God works. What "I" expect is not always going to be to His will, and that's what keeps life spontaneous, and exciting. I find peace in Him, not life circumstances, and that's where I can rest.

God used me this week in a great way. I had the chance to share a message that God had ministered to my heart, and did so for three nights of ministry at the 1825 Young Adult Cafe at the Rock Church, where I work at here in San Diego. We're currently doing a series called "Struggle" having to do with different struggles that we go through as young adults, giving the biblical side of things, rather than what the world has taught us. I felt compelled to share about my own personal story, focusing on Anger. In sharing of what Anger when handled in unrighteous ways has led us to, and how we can still be redeemed through the Love of Christ alone, and experience true transformation, and Forgiveness. Knowing that even amidst the pain and suffering we've experienced through the trauma we've experienced in our lives that has led us to our brokenness, God calls us to forgive those who have hurt us, not with the expectation of flipping a switch and being healed, but that through our will to be sheltered in Him through the process, with Him guiding our steps, that we can experience reconciliation, and be healed.

As the scripture says, we are to forgive as the Lord has forgiven you, and it probably won't make sense in many different ways, but that's because we know only the surface what we really need in our lives, and that's the beauty of having a loving Father that we can put our trust in, entrust our LIVES to, that will never fail us. I'm transformed, and can say with confidence that it was through God alone that it was possible.

I truly felt a moment of being filled by the spirit last night, as I was ministering to a friend after I gave my message. It was the affirmation I needed to know that I'm in the right place right now, and that through the witnessing of life change in our ministry, that God is glorified through the work we are doing.

We can take pain, hurt, and sadness and fuel bitterness, resentment, and hate. But if we trust in the Lord, it can be different. As the word say in Romans 5:1-5:

"Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God.

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us."

Put your Hope in Christ, and through him all things are possible for those who are in Christ Jesus.

I love you all, and thank you for taking this time. I pray you share this, so that others may be ministered to as hopefully you have been ministered to. All glory goes to our Lord, Jesus Christ, and I thank you Lord for allowing me to be your servant. May you bless your children, and children to come...

...Amen<3

Peace,
jiFi

Hillsong United!!!

A couple days ago, we decided as a house to go serve at the Hillsong United Conference in Aneheim, CA. IT WAS DOPE!!!!! Unfortunately, our house member Jared didn't come out, but we forgive him, 'cus we know he missed out! But seriously, I'm glad we came together, with friends, and not only served, but had the chance to grow closer through celebrating God in Worship, to the tunes of HILLSONG UNITED LIVE AND IN PERSON!!! Sorry, I'm still a bit excited ...

By faaaarrr it was the greatest worship experience I've had. Though, I didn't fall to my knees, or break down crying (That was the last time I saw them in concert ha), The atmosphere and presence of the Holy Spirit in that arena was second to none. Being that we were both serving and enjoying, we had the chance to be literally at the very front and center, having to strain our necks to look up at the band. We had to make sure there was about two feet of space inbetween the audience and the stage, in which we ended up occupying ourselves, with jumping, singing,and dancing around.

Phil Dewley spoke that night, and his message was both touching and motivating as well. He spoke about the different walls we put up in our lives, and how it was up to us, through God's calling in our lives, to break the barriors the devil tries to use us to keep up, and keep the body seperated. It resonated in me, being in a transistional time of discovering how God wants to use me in becoming a true Man of God, both Inside and Out (Inside FIRST).

The night was amazing, the pictures were amazing (though I don't have any to show, sorry!), and the time Rick, Josh, and I had to grow closer make it all the more worth it. I know our lives were touched by that experience, and I am excited in seeing how the Lord is going to exceed our expectations again and again in the coming months.

Jesus Christ, I love you, and thank you for what you are doing in our lives as a household. I pray and lift us all up to you Lord. I pray you strike our hearts with a boldness to stand for our faith, even with each other, with a conviction to be righteous for God, for each other, and for ourselves, and with a compassion to love each other how you love us each individually, with unending Grace and Care. Thank you my Lord Jesus, for dying on the cross, and for giving us life, not just to save us from death, but life right NOW ... to LIVE, and more so live for YOU. I lift this all to you Lord, in Jesus Christ's mighty name ...

... Amen <3

Believe HE is real, and trust He WILL provide, I love you all.

Peace,
jiFi

Take Up Your Cross and Follow Him ...

"24Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it."

Matthew 16:24-25

Last weekend I embarked on a trip with three other brothas to complete a mission of two parts. Our first always the same, on a personal level: To take time away from our regular routine that is our weekly practical life, and rest. The second always the same theme: To provide a means for the unknowing to know the God we worship and love. This we call our "Two Birds" Mission, being that we vacation with a double intent, killing two birds with one stone if you will. More so, as a symbolism of our individual partnership with the Holy Spirit, going to great lengths to bring the Gospel to the world, like a pair of birds in flight. Ok, so before I get too cheezy heh, this was our last mission:

We travelled about 8 hours north, to Yosemiti National Park, prepared (As much as we knew how) to hike the treacherous Half-Dome peak. The hike normally taking the experienced hiker about 10 hours round-trip, turning out to be 17 hours worth of more than we expected, both good and bad.

No, we're no THAT out of shape, but we did make lots of picture stops. Anyhoo, back to focus ... Our "Two Birds" mission was to carry our crosses up to the peak, with the expectation of leaving our crosses at the top, along with the burden of our past lives, our struggles, and baggage. Our crosses covered in scripture, and personal messages for the curious climber to see, hopefully be blessed by, and spark an interest in them to investigate Jesus Christ, and come to know Him. We fashioned up wooden crosses, about a foot by a foot and a half, nailed together and shaved down to be written on. We then strapped them onto our backpacks, for all to see, and started our journey 8,000+ feet up. The conversations we had with passing hikers encouraged us to keep moving, when they would ask what the crosses were about, and we would get to witness to them. The funniest part is that the most questioned we were asked were from others climbing up the last leg of the hike with us, up the verticle climb via cables to the very top of Half-Dome. You would think they would be caring more about risking their lives, but I guess what better to distract them from their fear then to tell them about Jesus.

We wanted to symbolize "Carrying our Cross", as Jesus calls us to do, and in the very least experience how it is to bear our burdens through our long journey, to finally be relieved of it when our mission was done. The physical Crosses themselves didn't matter, but it was what we left with them that counted. We prayed together at the top, holding our crosses up to the Lord, and then took individual time alone with God. We left it all behind on the mountain, and NO it doesn't mean we came back down perfect, or any more spiritual or better than we were, but that simply we came down cleaned of what God took off our shoulders, knowing that what we had been "Carrying on our Own" we "Left on the Mountain". We asked for God to take our burdens, so that we may be used to His will, in carrying the burdens of his Children. Little did we know that only an hour later, barely off the Half-Dome rock, did God already have a plan for us to serve one of his daughters.

Her name was Megan, and she was our true test. Our perspective of patience, physical stamina, and service were all shaken up, and stretched farther than we knew. As we walked by her, we heard, "Do you guys have lights?", and I knew what that meant. See, at the point we were at, being about 5:30 pm, you expect to be back at the bottom of the trail by about 10:00 pm. So, not having lights meant hiking in the pitch black, and probably getting rescued by the Ranger. It's a lot worse than you think, at least it was for us, knowing how bad it was even with lights. So, it turned out that Megan not only had 5 knee surgeries, but she wasn't exactly light, or swift on her feet, and ended up rolling both her ankles, and hurting both her knees again. To make a longer story shorter, we hiked a total of 17 hours, getting her back to her family at the bottom at 2:30 am, with parts where we had to literally carry her down the side of the mountain.

We ran out of water, out of energy, sometimes getting very close to running out of will power and patience. There was a point where we rested on the last leg of the hike, and she fell asleep on a rock, and was mumbling about just leaving her, and that she had her tiny light on her keychain to make it down. That only motivated us to stick together, and God blessed us with an extra boost of energy to carry her down. The whole experience was a definite trip, but only afterward when we talked about it, did we really realize how worth it the whole ordeal was.

We couldn't imagine what would have happened to her if we weren't there, and though it was the hugest struggle for us, it was such an amazing blessing. God had a great plan for us ready to go, and we couldn't help but connect the fact that we just released our burdens only right before to be ready for God to use us at His will, and he definitely did. during the experience we got to know her very well. We found out she didn't have much of a solid Church experience in her life, and was pushed away from the church by judgement, selfishness, and religion. I think the experience we had together really opened her eyes to the truth of the care that the Church should have for others, as God shined that through us to her, and the realness of all of our imperfect brokenness, both in grace and acceptance of each other as is. We found her thanking God by the end of the Hike, and we got to pray for her and her family.

We still lift her up, and pray she finds Christ. Hopefully when she goes through struggle, she will remember the experience she had with us, and know that there is a God that wants to help her. All she has to do is ask for "A Light to shine upon her, and guide per on her path."

I hope you were blessed by this as much as we were, and that you will take away the fact of knowing that even in our worst struggles, God has a plan, and is blessing you, and will bless you still. God Bless you all, and thank you God for an amazing testimony.

Peace,
jiFi

DCIS ... spelled C A N C E R.

I find that we tend to not lift up the value of life, until we find out it is at risk.

We start to tell the ones we love that we actually do love them, even as awkward as the circumstances may be, and start doing a count of the dreams we have yet to fulfill. For some we do an account of the moments we let pass, opportunities we watched slide by, and think of the goals that we once had, that we know are no longer attainable. I find that God has an interesting theme to times like these, that He uses for His great purpose. Whether a loved one gets sick, or a brother dies out in the field, or an unexpected accident occurs, no matter what the circumstance, God will use this time to bring families closer together, and reveal himself to us more. Well, unless we just tend to notice Him more, or ask for him more during hard times, which doesn't sound so outlandish, right? At any rate, I feel it's God's way of showing that even the "Worst" moments are bittersweet, and some are even much better than we think. Moments shrouded with veils, striking our hearts with strong emotion, when in actuality, they're blessings in disguise.

My mother has just been diagnosed with Ductal Carcinoma In Situ. What I do know is that it is cancer of the breast, and that my mother feels like she's dying. You'd be surprised how much your tear ducts can hold at one time, just ask my mom, and she'll tell you ... better yet don't but trust that it's much more than you think. When I found out there was even a chance that she may have cancer I broke down, sobbing on my knees in the middle of my street. I was told unexpectedly over the phone, and it was in that moment that everything came into my mind at once. Past, Present, Future ... Life, Love, Death ... Chance, Regret, Hope ... Confusion, Hate, Mercy. I found myself not caring about my composure, or who was looking, but most of all, I found myself crying out to God. I don't know if I've ever had a more concentrated emotional prayer, than in this moment. I praised God for his sovereignty, and his unexcapable provision, and then I begged Him for His mercy upon my mother, and prayed for MY perfect outcome. Then I stopped, took a breath, and prayed for strength for my mother, and for me to be there for my family, finally asking that God's will be done, and that He prepare our hearts for what ever the outcome. I'm happy to say that He did, and though I wanted the perfect outcome in my eyes, I knew that there was purpose behind whatever He needed to make happen, and I needed to trust Him regardless.

The moment I found out, I had an emotional moment, but nothing I couldn't handle. I found myself at a bit of peace, knowing that I had already given it up to God, in trust, and knew that if this was His plan, that it wouldn't change His provision, care, and Love for us. I had the chance to be a strong light for both my mom and my brother especially, and for that I thank God so much for bringing my family closer during this difficult time, and bringing us closer still as the days pass. Her consultation is this week, the surgery before the end of the month, and the follow-up soon after, to find out if there are any traces left behind.

Please pray. If at all possible take a small moment for us, especially to lift up my mom. God is good, and I mean it when I say all the time, and my prayer is that you won't have to go through a time like this to discover the truth in a Loving heavenly Father whose plan is greater and better than our own. All it takes is an opportunity for you to open up the gates for the Holy Spirit to interpret your prayers unto God, and then you get to see God work. Prayers don't get answered if you don't ask, and I can speak for myself when I tell you that mine have been, even in the midst of this difficult time. Pray that God continues to build this time for each of us as a testimony of his goodness, grace, mercy, and love. Thank you, and thank you for listening. I love you as my family, and families keep each other in the loop, so you'll be hearing from me soon. I pray God blesses you in your coming days.

Peace,
jiFi

House Boiling ...

So, the house warming was a success, almost too much of one to handle. Almost looked like a B.C. Party, except for the Christian/Worship Music we were bumpin', theological debates we were havin', and RockBand we were playin' ... well I guess that part counts. Anyhoo, it was an dope party, and we thank everyone that came out to support our new digs, and have fun!

I find quite amazing how God has worked in our little community that is 1825 and friends. Knowing that I came from not knowing any other Christians, to having an overflowing house full of them, that more than 80% of them I knew by name ... that is all God. I would have never guessed it, would have never gave it a single thought. However, I am so thankful that things worked out this way, and that they are still working out for the better.

Our room looks great! I personally think it's the sikkest room I've lived in, and at the same time most funtional. I'm happy in it, and if feels good coming home to it. Though, we do still have some cleaning to do that was left-over from the party explosion, but that's to be expected.

BTW ... Good and Healthy Churches on my list:

-Rock Harbor Church, in Orange County.
-Cornerstone Simi Valley, with Francis Chan.
-The Church at Rocky Peak, former ranch property of Charles Manson (ha, creepy but true).

... I visited them all today, and I give two thumbs up, so check the websites, and get some filling!!! I pray God does a true working in you to do great things for the Kingdom, because you're great ... not by anything you have done, but because God says you are, and can use even the lowliest of us sinners to be a true hero (Thanks Andy). I love you all, and pray God blesses you in this day.

Peace,
jiFi

House Warming ...

Thank you Jesus for this day, this home, this season, and this life.

This has been a great transistion for Jared and I thus far, and for me personally, I've found that though there was stress, anxiety, worry, you name it ... it still worked out, and God, as always, had my back. Plus, he gave me time to actually get away and rest, so now I'm at peace.

We have our official house warming THIS SATURDAY!!! So, we're just pushing to set up the room how we want it in time, so that's gunna be our project for the week, but it shouldn't take that much, so I'm not worried.

I can't wait to put up content about what God has been showing us in this new experience, but I know for sure God is showing us the fruit of learning and growing in a new experience with new people, and already we've grown closer getting to know each other as a house. Rick and Josh are already positively influencing me to be a better man, so I'm glad ... thank you Lord.

I love you, and I'll talk to you soon ...

Peace,
jiFi

New Chapter ...

So this is the new hottness! We haven't even fully moved in yet, but we're working on it for sure. It's exciting, and though we had a little bit of a rocky start, I'm fully excited about what is to come. Josh and Rick are great guys to live with thus far, and we're working out the house standards to make sure everyone is happy. Chris is coming in! Jared and I are happy, because that's what we wanted the whole time for him, and for us too. Please pray for us, and soon enough the rest of the guys should be on here bloggin' it up too.

'Til then, God Bless you!

Peace,
jiFi